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Labels: a moment of thought, poly, saddest moments
Yeah so last minute I decided to finally use the PT fund to belanja my kids, cousin, cat & OMMA pizza. After like months of figuring out how to do it, finally got the idea from Chris Tan. Must say, spending $197.60 in one afternoon is farking painful sia. Here were some pics:
Me with Afifah! Note I'm wearing a baju kurung. No shit.
My kids enjoying =)
My cousin very happy sia
Abang XK too happy until cannot swallow pizza properly
Seeing their happy faces really makes up for the heartache my wallet felt that day. Or at least slightly =). Hope you kids enjoyed it. I certainly did.
& on a more serious not;
Personally I don't really like you for all the annoying things you have been doing to me. & who says I am being nice for you? I am being nice because I never want to show my darkest side in front of the most important people in my life currently. My kids mean a lot to me, something you may not understand. My ideals may be foreign to someone who isn't mature enough to fully understand how to appreciate those around them.
Yeah I do talk down to people. But I only do so simply because I am superior(?) End of story. Cocky? Perhaps.
But if you can prove to be better than me, I'll gladly look up to you. Until then, you are in no position to make demands with me. You want buang me? You sure. You had better remember all the things I have done for this class. I could have been a selfish fucker & not help the rest. But I knew you guys really needed the help not just in academics, but also in their personal life. So I did offer everyone the olive branch should I have to.
But you take my kindness for granted & insult it? You are truly not worth my time.
Wednesday, 25 May 2011
Labels: a moment of thought, ns, poly, randomness, saddest moments
Tyreal, Archangel of Diablo
I'm deeply conflicted.
Seriously conflicted.
Unbelievably conflicted.
Someone has been bothering me lately. She's been absolutely unreasonable. She expects me to visit her every week. It's like I can't even have my own free time. I mean I'm already working on Saturdays & I delegate all my school work on Sunday. Why must I drop everything just to visit you? I outgrew you a long time ago. & now you come back demanding things to be your way? Why should I listen to you. You weren't there during the most pivotal moment in my life...
When will you just let it go?
& I really hate this feeling...
Reminds me of me & the kiwi. Nice moments we had. Pity nothing really happen. & history shall repeat itself? I wonder if I should do anything....
Rock-climbing was awesome really. Did the 15 deg slope & straight wall. Fell off the 75 deg one though. At least I tried!
& Thursday....
I really do miss my NSF days. Can't wait to go for Night training again. Meet up with my NS friends. Disturbing my Sir again...
If you were wondering, among all the NSF-Officer relationships, me & CPT Tan Y S was the closest. He was the only one who could reign me in & I really treated him like the father I never had.
I miss hanging out with people my age. THose guys & their madness. Can't wait for tomorrow!
& if you wondering why Tyreal?
I hope to see the light soon enough. Maybe Salam & co. can help me out.
=)
Ciaos random passer by....
Wednesday, 27 April 2011
Labels: a moment of thought, pathetically stupid until I dun even know why i wrote it, poly, randomness, saddest moments, UCL
Wow I don't really know why do I feel so emotional right now. Maybe it's because of all the pretentiousness in school. When will I find the day where I can just sit down somewhere in school & just read my books quietly? God knows really. With all the lessons all packed up together & mostly spending my breaks on FIFA 11 or with my classmates (which are hell a lot better than what I expected) I feared the worst really before coming to SP. Thought it was going to be yet another IJC despair for me really.
Then again it's only been 3 weeks after all.
& seeing you with another guy makes my heart rip apart really.
A#####
How I really love you.
(Sighs)
Why the fuck am I so emo right now????
& Schalke lost. As a German football fan, I'm disappointed with the Blues' performance. So much hype about their fortress-like Veltins Arena came up to nothing.
As a Bayern Munich fan however...
In your face!!!! Haha...
I need to get my head fixed up seriously. I don't like being so emotional. It's so attention-seeking really.
Unless subconsciously I do want attention. Odd really since I am like in the middle of the class really (guys at least, I hope!)
Arghh seeing her Facebook display picture with another guy really bums me out. I so need to get a life!!!
Bye random passer byes....
Wednesday, 11 November 2009
Labels: a moment of thought, ns, saddest moments, soccer
Seriously, my blog's fucking boringlah...& vulgar (That's a given really)
Taken from http://soccernet.espn.go.com/news/story?id=697123&sec=europe&cc=4716
Germans have reacted with shock and disbelief after national team 'keeper Robert Enke's apparent suicide at a train crossing near Hannover on Tuesday night. The national team have called off training as tributes to the goalkeeper flood in.
Some highlights of his life...
1977: Born on August 24 in Jena in central Germany.
1985: Signs for the junior team of local club SV Jena.
1986: Moves to city rivals FC Carl Zeiss Jena.
1995-96: Makes his professional debut for Carl Zeiss Jena against Hannover.
1996: Joins Borussia Monchengladbach.
1997: Makes Germany Under-21 debut.
1998: Makes his Bundesliga debut in a 3-0 win over Schalke on August 15.
1999: Moves to Portugal to sign for Benfica - managed by German Jupp Heynckes - and is promptly named as captain.
July: Is named in Germany's squad for the Confederations Cup, but does not feature in the tournament.
2002: Moves to Barcelona on a free transfer, but makes just four first-team appearances - only one of them in the league - in three seasons.
2003: Moves on loan to Turkish side Fenerbahce, but terminates his year-long deal after a single appearance in which he is pelted with missiles by the club's fans.
2004:
January: Begins a more successful loan spell with Tenerife, then in Spain's Segunda Division.
July: Returns to the Bundesliga with Hannover on an initial two-year deal.
2006:
September 17: Enke's daughter Lara dies at the age of two from a heart defect.
December 25: Signs a new contract to the end of the 2009-10 season.
2007:
March 27: Makes his international debut in a 1-0 defeat to Denmark.
July 23: Is elected as club captain by his Hannover team-mates.
2008:
October 8: Breaks a bone in his left hand in training with the national team, ruling him out for two months.
2008-09: Named as the Bundesliga's goalkeeper of the season.
2009: September: Suffers a bacterial infection, ruling him out for six games.
November 10: Police in Germany confirm Enke has died, aged 32, in an accident at a level crossing.
Who say's football is just a game. For some, it's a matter of life & death. God bless his soul.
& handling reservists is no piece of cake. Especially when the people around you think you're a gay piece of fuck who can't be an instructor. FUCK it man....
& Faris, it's ok. Some things are just mean't to be.
Ciao people...& by people I mean the random passerby(s) who would read this...
Sunday, 2 August 2009
Labels: pathetically stupid until I dun even know why i wrote it, saddest moments
"When rage meets madness"
I'm sure everyone has had this feeling. When nothing ever goes right with whatever you do. It's like Murphy's Law governs your life. By the way, Murphy's Law states that anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
It's been what...3...nearly 4 months of NS life & I've done nothing to improve myself. In fact I practically damaged my own body due to sheer stupidity (refer to accident at MTV) & now my back's giving me issues. Plus eyesight's horrible as usual. I'm gonna end up blind before 25 probably!
I hate my fucking job at Admin department. It's so fucking boring & idiotic & just plain fucking useless. I'm like a good-for-nothing-idiot in that place. I should be running about, helping fellow recruits or teaching skills or even giving injections to people. But no!!! I had to open my fucking mouth & OOC from medical orderly course & now I have become the most useless idiot in the whole admin department.
& it doesn't help that I don't even have the fucking guts to talk to the girl I like...(Yes the same girl from Innova) I'm a gutless idiot who fell for a really sweet, nice & hot girl but can't even open my mouth to talk to her. So much for being a flirt(this nickname is from Alex & for the record, I have never agreed with this)
Nor does it help that I have deproved SO MUCH as a goalkeeper. Even Alex & Justin are better than me. Mind you I was the best in that bloody court!
I hate this fucking useless feeling of despair, anger, rage & above all if there is such a word....USELESSNESS
FUCK!!!!!!!!!
I apologise for the f... words being used here.
Tuesday, 12 August 2008
Labels: Bayern, saddest moments, something interesting, typical day
"Truly a beautiful death"
Today my Geography teacher asked the lecture group this.
"Is China the black hole of the world economy?"
I was one of the few who disagreed & I based my answer on the concept of black holes itself.This was my reply,
"China is not a black hole. Sure it sucks in hell a lot of FDI. Sometimes angmoh businessmen go in never come out. But I believe it is the powerhouse of the world economy. Its products are found across the globe & it is now a global power. No, I think it's the Sun of the world economy"
Skepticism greeted me at first. But the lecturer saw reason behind my answer.
A Black hole occurs when the mass of the star is so great that it no longer has the ability to handle its own gravity strength. It collapses onto itself and soon, a state known as singularity is achieved. It is also known as the point where a black hole is formed.
& the event horizon is a point of no return. I am at that point.
I want to tell someone but I simply can't. I'm beginning to break under the pressure but I mustn't say a word. I can only hope that the people reading this are my friends & not people who would insult me further.
Doctors tell me that 20% is still a good chance but I have my doubts. I knew this will happen & I was initially ready for it but when it actually happens, you simply crack emotionally. I hate this.
But I must not let anyone else suffer. That was my promise.
Bayern Munich vs Hamburg this weekend.
& according to Caspar,he buys Puma shoes because it's a lion. It's a 4E1 syndrome.
Saturday, 9 August 2008
Labels: Bayern, f......, saddest moments
Tunggu di sini
Memikirkan kenapanya
Apa yang laku
Tidak boleh diambil baliknya
Kenapa ia laku?
Aku tak boleh jawab
Hanya sekarang
Aku cuba memikirnya
Maafkan aku ini
Sebelum aku hilang
Maafkan aku
Sebelum aku kehilangan
Song that I composed. The probability that Peter Pan will sing it is zero.
Singapore at Olympics. God bless them. Bayern playing tommorrow in the DFB Cup
Thursday, 7 August 2008
Labels: saddest moments
Murphy's Law states that everything that could go wrong, will go wrong.
Murphy's Law simply sums up my week. Started off badly with "the unfortunate incident" followed by the silent court incident followed by oddity in class & now followed by disaster.
At least my economics teacher was a bit respectful today. Can tell that she was sincerely worried about me. THX.
Something bad happened recently that caused me to snap. & I guess it caused my sudden outburst.
Assuming that it's the usual people reading this, I won't say muchlah
Assuming it's another group of people, this isn't a publicity stunt.
"Itsuka wakariaeru kara" means someday we will understand each other. It's my MSN nick right now.
Saturday, 2 August 2008
Labels: f......, saddest moments
I'm not really the type of person who blogs every single day but lately there's been way too much stuff going on that I just had to get it off my chest.
Just in case she didn't see it since I deleted my previous post...She apologised to me on Friday. & I feel like such an ass for metioning it in my MSN. I mean it's like I'm rubbing it into her face. I totally didn't deserve the apology.
"I don't hate you for what you did. I know you didn't know such a small thing would hurt me so badly. I guess I'm more pissed off with the class rather than you. I didn't do anything wrong. I didn't bitch about anyone in the class, I didn't do no shit crimes against you guy.I just don't think I deserve such behaviour from you guys. If I did want an apology, it should have been from the class, not you. What I did was also stupid, & quite insulting to you for publicising my anger. No, I wasn't really hurt by the lecture thing. I was just merely irritated by the fact that it was you, someone I had always treated nicely. I just didn't think I deserved it. No real need to apologise to me. It should be the other way round"
My friend from Canada came back today. It was totally nice remembering all the fun times we had together in 3E1. From soccer-crazed me to Caspar-Ivan gayism to Boon Hong's craziness to Randy's way of livening lessons up. It was really nice. Hoping to see you on Monday!
That was all I had to say.
Saturday, 12 July 2008
Labels: Job well done, Me, saddest moments
I decided to officially blog about the investiture because I wanted to thank people. & apparently me, Luqman & Zul are the macho guys of council. OMFGLAH But thanks Tuhin for that brilliant speech!
& this is what the Third Students' Council of Innva JC is all about...
420 Days, 60 weeks, 15 of us, 10 events, 4 will remain in our hearts & One family
& this is funny..
"Mr President, read the sign man!"
To Tuhin,
Hello there my Indian Brother! Thanks for being one of the better presidents in IJC. Without you and your wit & ability to talk to teachers, many thing we wanted would not have happened. Thx for fighting for us.
To Jiayi,
Haha guess you are someone who always tries to save the day when Tuhin can't. Hard worker indeed. Been nice working with you Doraemon!
To XT,
nothing to say to my babygirl..coz words are not enough.
To Anthea,
THX FOR BEING OUR MUMMY. Always caring about our welfare & being our dance pro..mummy..hairstylist...artist..(many thingslah). & no more fetishes about malay boys ok!
To Baoren,
I want to smack his face. Dunno why. Now no more emails from him! Sad moment. THx for those emails =) & for stepping up o be our council spokesman.
I need to group people because I dun like typing
To Hajar & John,
Our brilliant comedians. Always bringing a smile upon our faces. Thx for those happy times people. & Thx John for P-E-R-S-I-A-N!
Simaa,Sarah and Luqman
It has been an enjoyable time working ith you guys, especially during O2 at the finale committee. Really nice working, & being goofy with you guys. Jiayos ok! & you guys really brightened up my day =)
Zul & Willy...
Hi Gay Boy. Hope you finally get it now(wonder if you know what I'm talking about. & Willy, must be positive. Thx guys for always flanking me whn I'm sad, for trying to cheer me up. ThX
Ham, thx for showing us the joy of donuts. Without you, I'll be even more lighter now. & i hope that you can always be happy, no more being lonely ok!
Michel, Huda, JF & Hakim...
WE'd never forget you guys. You'll never walk alone once you are part of the THIRD.
To Sam,
There were nice times & there were the sucky ones. Sorry for irrtating you like this...nothing to say really. I'll just remember the nice moments we had. Sammie & Shasha =)
& thanks to teachers who have guided us along the way. Specially mentions to Ms Yun & Mr Yip for boosting my morale. Mrs Naidu for teaching me how to adopt a kid!!! Mr How, Mr Cho for being our jokers. Mr Teo, Mr Chu & Ms Leong for showing us the way during Orientation. & Mr Lim for Prom Nite
Monday, 7 July 2008
Labels: f......, Me, NPCC, saddest moments
"Disappointed with myself"
I dedicate this post to a bunch of people who have stuck with me right to the end. Thanks to Dinah, Raj & Situ for trying to encourage me even after losing our second consecuive match tonight. Thanks to the Soccer people for just having this group.
Damn you Brandon aka Brenda for calling me a sissy! Senbonzakura Kageyoshi & pink is not THAT feminine.
& thank you Syahid & Jem. for trying to keep me occupied in school. I guess being with me has indeed make you all outsiders. Thank you.
The loneliness finally cracked today during soccer. It was totally painful to imagine. I just wanted to cry but there were no tears. The spirit of eternal dread & discord haunted me as Alex & I remembered the funny moments about 4E1 people like Yan Rui & John. Yes, there were nice, good people indeed.
I feel so useless in council. I know I've been an integral part of it but I've underachieved in it. & plus the sheer stupidity ruin wonderful friendships. How I wished that I had a way to warp the space-time continual & go back again. & it was such a regret to say goodbye to NPCC. Those kids always, always made my week.
My subjects are going downhill. I just can't to these H2s & H1s. I just want the pain to stop now. Regret filled my heart, knowing that SP was THE option to take in March 2008. I know I'll fail my A levels. I know that polytechnic was the way to go. & it was encouraging to know people were backing me up to go for it after JC.
Yes...today I'm rambling about myself.
Saturday, 5 July 2008
Labels: NPCC, saddest moments
"The end of my era"
Around 1 year ago, I decided that all the things I did as a SI wasn't enough. I had the desire to give something more to my unit, a family of people that changed my life. For 2 gruelling months, I went through a tough CI course just to be able to give back to this unit.
Yesterday marked the end of an important chapter of my life. I finally bade goodbye to CBSS NPCC. For six glorious years, I learn what it really meant to be a leader. To be able to give your all just for your cadets. To serve & protect those cadets. To impart what I've learnt to those cadets. Now it's finally over.
To the Sec 4s, I've already said what I wanted to in those letters. It may be short & hard to comprehend, but I hope those words would mean something to all of you. I'm happy to have served as your CI for the past 12 months. You all have really matured.
Yes, I will miss NPCC. No incompetent fool can ever change that.
I will miss those kids.
& I will miss being their banana sir.