Got my place in UCL but I might end up throwing it all away. No bright future. No uni, local or otherwise.

All of it comes down to my scholarship.

Already got rejected for PA scholarship.

Not at all confident about IDA or CAAS. I don't think I'm at all good enough. I don't know. People have been telling me I'll get it. I deserve it. I deserve my break.

I dunno. All that doubt. I'm not at all perfect. I stopped being so arrogant, not because I chose to be humble but rather because I got nothing to be arrogant about. Getting some diploma with merit or a good cert or even an acceptance into a top level university just seems so meaningless.

I ain't good enough.

All them self doubt creeping in.

I dunno anymore.