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So my birthday was rather interesting this year.
On my birthday I got a wonderful Sakae Sushi dinner with Alex & Rosz. Finally tried Unagi and I didn't die or anything. Thanks guys!
And the very next day Limei gave me the best surprise ever!
So the gang came together like finally for a nice birthday dinner at Swenson's! Was a very nice surprise! Plus Zachary baked me an awesome birthday cake. I really do miss these guys! Thank you so much Xinkai, Zane, Limei, Davin, Vincent and Zach!!!
Such a nice bunch of people :)
Turning 23 was something I didn't look forward to. Just 7 years away from the big 30 and I've achieved little. Just a mediocre A level cert and a good Poly cert. No degree. No masters. No nice job. I have nothing.
And I'm in a nation which indirectly marginalizes me because of my language abilities, finances and essentially because of who I am. It's terrible to know that my own family is so critical of my ability to study in the UK. It's disheartening to hear that from your own family while your lecturers are completely confident of your abilities. My ex-course manager even told me to forget local universities. Guess she agreed with my sentiments.
I want to leave.
I want to be rid of this tyranny.
I want to be rid of all the emotional baggage.
I want to be rid of all the dishonour and distrust that is my family.
I want to be rid of all the people who do nothing but hurt me.
I want to redeem myself.
Is that so hard to do?
And I have learnt something important. Again.
You can do so much for the people around you, the people whom you care about. But in the end they will always end up hurting you. It doesn't matter who it is. Friends. Family. Loved ones. No one is an exception to this rule. Why? Because you will end up hurting them too. You will end up disappointing them. In the end, the one person who can bear you hurting them while they hurt you, will be the hardest to find. But the most rewarding.
It is a lesson that I cannot seem to learn.